Recently, my patience is really limited. A moment ago, my mum was nagging at me because of a friend. I do not wish to mention his name. Because he did not have a printer, he have to go others' place to print his document. He came to my house and print. Then my mum was nagging at me because I let him print for free. I got her message already but she still goes nagging. I got seriously pissed off by her and i shouted at her real loud. I do not want to shout in the first place but she keep nagging at me. I feel so terrible after shouted at her. I mean if you want me to charge him money, I am alright with it. You don't have to nag so many times like as if it is a big thing. I quarreled with her and soon after, she stopped nagging. It was total silence after that. Seriously speaking, I don't want this to happen. I am already frustrated with my work in terms of school and work and she have to add on. Now, the atmosphere is so intense and I don't feel comfortable. If I done anything wrong, just tell me once. Nagging just make me pissed off. I have been trying to tell her that and she doesn't gets it....
8 Jan 2010
Today's NYP Open House, i totally ruined it for one class. I was a total failure. I feel a very strong sense of disatisfying. As in, I didn't let the students fully understand any of the course. I actually misled them. I even made them walked up the steps. Really, screw this. This was not i intended. I was full of energy and excited once I got to know my secondary school is coming for the open house. But yet, i runined with my own hands. The feeling is really sucks. I asked my juniors and I got to know that they are coming to NYP at around. I got up at 9am and making my way to NYP to volunteer my help despite the fact that i am supposed to report at 12pm. I hate this feeling. Really. A really simple job and yet i failed. ARRR!!!! This feeling is really miserable... Still, seeing them mostly went back happily. I felt happy for them. After that, i joined with my usual clique and headed back to secondary school to see if i can help out with the CCA Open House. Generally, it was good. I reached with sore calf muscle and fatigue... What a mixed feeling i have...
1 Jan 2010
Right now, i really don't know what to do. I am frustrated. My life is screwed when my father passed away. I really hate it. Some people said i must be very close to my mother. In fact, it is the opposite. I tried talking to her, it failed. Last time, i tried sharing my problems with her and she just shot me down. From then on, i never share my problems, joy and sorrows with her. When i need a listening ear, i usually turn to my friends. But usually, i just kept it to myself. I just endured it over. Every single crap i got, i just kept it to myself. To be honest, she doesn't even know how i am doing in poly right now. I know she will just nag me again. Everytime, she will just nag. One thing i hate most is massive nagging. Unfortuantely, my mum is doing that. She is still restricting me in almost every ways. This is pure crap. I really hate it. I understands that she cares but can she not overdoing it? CAUSE RIGHT NOW I FEELING THAT SHE IS OVERDOING IT. At home, i rarely talk to her. I think that is why i don't really speak much on the way home or to campus. I would just switch on my headset and blast the music. Hoping to get deaf but it didn't work out. Enduring and persevering....
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